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Post by SarahW on Sept 8, 2005 17:42:28 GMT
To All Book Lovers,
The Hollow Heart by Martina Devlin is a brilliant read. I can't put it down or stop thinking about it. Do read it, you won't regret it.
Sarah
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Post by Tracy on Sept 9, 2005 16:10:42 GMT
I would like to second Sarah's comment. I read it in one setting, I literally could barely let it out of my hand. Martina writes so well anyway, and she writes so poignantly about her desire for a baby and how she tried to conceive ... it'll have you in tears. I suffered fertility problems myself (in the end we had one son, my beloved Tadhg, so my story ended more happily), and I can tell you that what she wrote struck such a chord. She was able to describe well the pain and the hurt and the desperation that I was feeling ... and I'm sure that every couple feels when they deal with infertility. In many ways she was writing my story too in a way I wasn't able to do ... and the story of every person who has ever experienced infertility.
But yet it's not doom-and-gloom - it's an upbeat book about the strength of the human spirit too.
It is absolutely a must-read. As Sarah said, she can't stop thinking about it, and neither can I ... it's a book which will live with you long after you put it down.
If you get to read this in time, you might like to know that Martina is going to be on tonight's Late Late Show (9th Sept) discussing the book.
All best, Tracy
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Post by Shirley on Sept 12, 2005 7:28:20 GMT
I saw her on the Late Late Show - she's so eloquent, isn't she? She really has a striking way of expressing herself, even when she's talking about a subject as sad as infertility. She's so brave to try to help people by sharing her own pain.
I haven't read any of her books, but I loved her column in Ireland on Sunday years ago. I missed it when she left IOS. I know she writes for the Sunday World now, but I'm not too keen on that paper cos you'd fly through it. I did buy it a few weeks ago though when Martina had an article in it.
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Post by Shirley on Sept 12, 2005 7:30:22 GMT
Actually, there was a really sad show on RTE last year about couples undergoing treatment for infertility - some of you might remember it. It was on Monday nights just before Prime Time. Anyway, I was thinking when I saw Martina's interview that those were the kinds of people that she would really help with her book.
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Post by Mary on Sept 12, 2005 8:45:41 GMT
I saw Martina on the Late Late on Friday - she was excellent and it can't have been easy to discuss her personal life with as much dignity and poise as she did.
Mary
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Post by tatty on Sept 12, 2005 19:34:29 GMT
this book sounds great it is a definately on my 'next' list
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Post by susanmay on Sept 12, 2005 20:01:09 GMT
I saw Martina on Pat Kenny Friday night. She really is a lady. I hope this book will be a great help to couples in the same position.
PS Speaking of Pat Kenny did anyone see Daniel O' Donnell's performance! What a classic!!!
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Post by Shirley on Sept 13, 2005 7:19:08 GMT
Hi Susan, I saw it - oh Lord above, I saw it. What is going on in this country - Daniel is like a God all over again!
And what can I say about the suit he wore......
I happened to see a bit of his Sunday night show as well, because I was watching Fair City and just left the channel on......Holy Mother of God......
I don't know what else to say about the man except fair play to him, I suppose!!!
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Post by susanmay on Sept 13, 2005 7:23:50 GMT
I'd have probably been attacked on Saturday night by some of his die hard fans with the amount of laughing I done!! I give him 10/10 for gall!!! That jacket was like something that fell off a Christmas tree!
PS He has a good voice though!
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Post by Shirley on Sept 13, 2005 7:42:19 GMT
I had no idea that he'd had such an amount of success in America!
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Post by susanmay on Sept 13, 2005 8:06:23 GMT
Either did I. It just goes to show you how far a sparkly jacket can get you!
And it also goes to show my social life on a Friday night!!!!
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Post by Shirley on Sept 13, 2005 8:14:46 GMT
Mine as well chick - I'm with ya on that!! Can't afford to go out anymore! You'd know we were recent house-buyers - a social life is the first thing that goes out the window!
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Post by susanmay on Sept 13, 2005 8:23:38 GMT
What are we like two under 30's chatting about Pat Kenny!
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Post by claire on Sept 13, 2005 11:54:44 GMT
Well your giving me a good laugh!
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Post by catherine daly on Sept 13, 2005 18:40:45 GMT
Read Hollow Heart almost in a single sitting (Almost because the sun went in on the beach in Amalfi and I had to relocate-- gloat!!) and I have to agree with everyone. Brilliant read, impossible to put down.
xx c
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Post by tatty on Sept 14, 2005 17:40:29 GMT
Is it available in England apart from Amazon?
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Post by catherine daly on Sept 14, 2005 17:43:25 GMT
Yes, should be - it's a penguin book, and I think it hits all the shops about now.
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Post by tatty on Sept 14, 2005 17:55:07 GMT
Thanks catherine will be definately on the lookout for that book sounds great.
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Post by charlene on Sept 17, 2005 16:38:22 GMT
me too, hope I can get hold of it.
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Post by Marian on Sept 18, 2005 14:56:12 GMT
My credit card is in an awful state with all these books you gals keep recommending!
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Post by tatty on Sept 18, 2005 15:41:11 GMT
Mine too, i spend more money per month on books than anythin else
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Post by claire on Oct 31, 2005 9:55:37 GMT
just found this
BABY BLUES
30 Sep 2005
Martina Devlin wanted a baby. That's where the story began. Sadly, it's not where the story ended.
The story became a long, drawn-out, protracted affair, with twists, turns, tears, tantrums and, ultimately, not a birth...but a rebirth.
Martina Devlin's quest for that longed-for baby cost her everything, in terms of her marriage and sent her off on a different path. And it was that path that was to lead to The Hollow Heart - the true story of one woman's desire to give life and how it almost destroyed her own.
Much of her story centres around her battle with IVF (in-vitro fertilisation) and the heartache that was to see her lose nine embryos, her husband and her dream of filling her house with the music of children.
'IVF can be hell. You are pumped so full of drugs and hormones that, at times, you feel a bit like a battery hen,' says Martina.
'Hormonal pin-ball games are being played out inside your head. Your sleeping pattern is shot to pieces, because you are setting the alarm clock at all hours of the day and night. And, by the time you reach the actual IVF stage, you are both emotionally and physically hammered.'
She wrote the book - an evocative, searching memoir - because she felt there were many Irish women in the same position as herself and all suffering in silence.
'I wanted them to know that they were not alone. I wanted them to know that it was okay to feel the insane range of emotions that they were feeling. I wanted to know that feeling jealous of pregnant women was natural and normal. But, mostly, I wanted them to know that there was another way.'
She also wanted people to know that IVF is no quick-fix solution. Sometimes it's no fix at all.
'We belong to this instant gratification society. Everything is happening so fast around us that we want and demand things immediately. Some people approach having a baby in exactly the same frame of mind. But it's not like that.'
Okay, so you have all manner of drugs, all kinds of hormones, needles, sticks and special prods. Throw a couple of doctors into the mix and there's a recipe for potential disaster.
'I think the woman can be dehumanised when she is thrown into the middle of this IVF drama. I honestly believe that doctors sometimes forget that they are dealing with real human beings, with real feelings.
'When one of the surgeons I was dealing with broke the news to me that I was unable to have children, he never even looked at me. He just read the devastating result off a sheet of paper in front of him.
'I wanted to scream at him: 'You've just given me what is tantamount to a death sentence and you can't be bothered even to look at me!!' But I didn't. I appreciate that doctors have to maintain a degree of clinical attachment. But, c'mon.'
The journey through the 'promised land' of IVF was not a successful one for Martin Devlin. But the Omagh lass did learn more than a few valuable lessons. It also gave her new direction in her life.
'In ways I feel lucky because I came through it and was able to emerge on the other side with a new life. True, I lost my husband and I lost my baby dream, but I found something else.
'There is another kind of fertility.it's called creativity and I feel full with it and because of it. I started writing, more for occupational therapy than anything else. Then I started living through my characters, to a degree. I gave some of them happy endings; others had happy endings withheld. The creative process helped me to re-engage with life. It taught me that when you are up against a brick wall, you don't have to stand there. You can climb over it, you can tunnel underneath it, you can get around it.'
What advice would she give women who are thinking of going down the IVF route? 'Go into the process with your eyes wide open. Also, know the reality: the success rate for IVF is one in five, which means 80% of couples go home without a baby. Forewarned is forearmed.'
She also feels that the couple's relationship needs to be on a sure footing.
'The IVF process will test the mettle of your relationship to the full. If there are cracks there, they can quite easily be turned into chasms. There are so many stresses associated with IVF, so many investigations. It can be brutal and invasive. Go into it with a hopeful heart, but have a fall-back plan.'
EXCERPT:
'As I murmured to my (embryonic) children I tried to envisage them growing inside me. I pictured them latching diminutive fingers and hooking minuscule toes onto the lining of my uterus. Limpets inside instead of outside the host hull of my body. I didn't see babies floating within amniotic fluid, tethered to an umbilical cord, as you do in ultrasound scans: I visualized them curling their bodies towards mine and fastening onto me. Hopelessly inaccurate biologically - giggles bubbled through me whenever I conjured up the image. Even now, I find myself smiling at my vision of Velcro babies'
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orlagh
Junior Member
Posts: 48
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Post by orlagh on Nov 9, 2005 18:54:58 GMT
I have to buy this book now! The reason I hadn't bought it before was because a close relative of mine, who was also going through IVF, didn't recommend it. She felt that it didn't accurately portray the experience. I'd rather make my own mind up though and I can see from this board that a lot of people disagree with her!
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Post by susanmay on Aug 14, 2006 12:50:31 GMT
Really enjoyed this book. The writing was powerful. It was very brave of Martina to write. My heart went out to both Martina and her husband Brendan.
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Post by Shirley on Mar 4, 2008 21:06:10 GMT
I just read The Hollow Heart and it was so well written. You couldn't but empathise while reading it, and I literally couldn't turn the pages fast enough even though I knew the outcome.
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Post by hannah24 on May 7, 2008 22:04:22 GMT
I just read The Hollow Heart and it was so well written. You couldn't but empathise while reading it, and I literally couldn't turn the pages fast enough even though I knew the outcome. I was able to purchase it recently over here Shirley. I know what its like to long for children, and not be able to have them; the books been on the desk staring at me. I'll start reading it today...with a box of tissues beside me.  |
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Post by hannah24 on May 9, 2008 0:51:44 GMT
Oh my... need more tissues. Still reading more today... |
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Post by Shirley on May 9, 2008 12:20:32 GMT
It is a heartbreaking book. It must have been very hard for her to write it, but maybe it was also a release of sorts, and might help others in the same situation. She's a brave lady.
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Post by hannah24 on May 9, 2008 12:58:58 GMT
It is a heartbreaking book. It must have been very hard for her to write it, but maybe it was also a release of sorts, and might help others in the same situation. She's a brave lady. God Shirley, it sure helps alright...I'm speechless reading it, but its also comforting read. A brave lady alright. Many who read this, who can relate to her story, will find great comfort, even if they along the way. hannah xox |
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Post by hannah24 on May 11, 2008 3:02:48 GMT
Oh...need to put it down, too much for me at the moment , its real, raw and courage + hannah xox |
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